Do you ever feel like Patricia Heaton's character Deborah from the show Everybody Loves Raymond? Because I do- ALL.THE.TIME.
In the days Pre Kids (P.K.) I used to think to myself- "God, she's such a bitch!" "Why's she so mean to her husband?!" "WTF is her problem?"
Well... Now I know! I really, truly, get it. She's overwelmed, she's tired, her mind won't shut off, and she's overwelmed (that needs to be said twice.)
Being a mom is hard, being a wife is hard, hell, being a person is hard! Put those three together and you've got a tornado of thoughts running through your mind at any given moment.
Ugh, the sink is full of dishes. I should do them. No, I did them last time, so Dadd-O should do them... but he's playing with the boys, that's more important. I should be playing with them too. But if I don't do the dishes now, they'll still be there tomorrow and Dadd-O isn't home tomorrow, so I'll never get them done and the world will end!!
This is just a tiny sample of what goes on in my head at any given moment. (You're welcome.)
So, how do I curb my inner Deborah? Well, I'm not always able to keep that bitch on lock-down, but I do have a few tricks that work for me:
Deep Breaths- I know this sounds cheesy, but it really does work. When I can feel myself getting close to losing my shit, I take a few slow, deep breaths... then turn on my Stepford wife face and go back to parenting.
Time Away- Sometimes I choose to do the dishes, or bring the laundry downstairs just so that I can have a tiny bit of time to myself. And sometimes I pretend I'm pooping so that I can check facebook in private.
Be Honest- Sometimes I just have to tell my boys (Dadd-O included), that I'm having a rough day. That it's hard for me to be patient/kind/calm, and that I need them to be understanding/helpful/patient. Basically, consider this a warning shot.
How do you keep it together as a partner, parent, person??
